Like this:

You met Joe at a party last week. He seems like a nice guy. When he told you about his line of work, you realize that Joe would be a good person to invite to a networking meeting that you will be attending next week, because he may be a good fit for the group.

You tell Joe a little bit about the upcoming event and extend an invitation for him to come as your guest. At that point Joe turns to you and says “Sounds good, I’ll try to make it…” You say “Great, I look forward to seeing you!”

…And the conversation ends.

How often has someone responded by telling you that they would “try to make it” to an event that you invited them to?

When you hear this all-to-common excuse, how often does that leave you with a feeling of doubt about the person’s integrity? Do you really think that they are going to come or was it just a way for them to exit the conversation and move on?

While there are legitimate reasons why people cannot attend a function, by and large, people are afraid to commit to something that they are not familiar with. Sure, you invited them and you told them how wonderful it will be for them to attend, but right now, they’re still not convinced and nor do they fully understand the benefits of attending and the detriments of not. Every man, woman and child in the world makes a decision based upon the information that they have at that particular time. If you’re attempting to get someone to come to a meeting or a party — anywhere — you need to supply them with more information that educates them as to why it is in their interest, but also gets them to firmly commit to a position.

The easiest way to do this is by asking questions of the person that will shift them out of their current thought process and into one that guides them in the direction that they should be going — in this case towards making a firm commitment: Yes or No.

When you invited Joe to attend your networking meeting, you may have told him about some of the people that are involved or how it has helped your business. At this moment in time Joe really doesn’t care about you or anyone else — he’s concerned only about himself. (This is normal and natural so don’t be offended). It’s easy for Joe to give himself an out by saying “Sounds good, I’ll try to make it.”

Before the conversation ends, you could say something like “Joe, can I ask you a quick question?” When he says yes, you can say something like: “If you were able to reach your sales goals in a shorter period of time, what would you do with the extra time you had?”

Then shut up and listen to what he has to say. (He’s probably stunned because no one has ever asked him a question like this before). It may cause him to stop and pause to think for a moment and he may start talking about a place he wants to travel to. He may talk about spending more time with his family. Maybe he’ll say it will cause him to do something he’s always wanted to do. The conversation will turn away from his objection to a subject he’s going to want to talk about. Your job is to give him a little room to speak but then get him back on track.

Once Joe starts talking about what he’ll do with the extra time, at some point you need to ask him: “How can I help you to get that extra time?” Joe may say something like “you can refer me business” or “introduce me to ….” That’s when you can point Joe in the direction of accepting the invitation to come to your event: “Joe, I can help you get that extra time you want by introducing you to some of the people who would be willing to refer you qualified business, over time. Would you like to meet them?” When he says yes, then reiterate your invitation by saying “Many of the people that you want to meet — or those that know or deal with them on a regularly — are part of my inner circle. They will be with me at the event next week. I want to personally introduce you to them. ” (Joe may wonder “how can I become a part of the inner circle”)

“By the way while you’re there, you will be introduced to a lot of people, so bring a lot of extra business cards.” (This will mentally cause Joe to see himself at the at the meeting being introduced to people). “Joe, I need to reserve a spot for you, so I need to know if you are coming, by 11:00 AM tomorrow. Please call me at ____”.

Give him a short deadline. If you leave too much time, you’re not conveying that it’s urgent and to his benefit to attend. If you allow Joe to send an email or a text, while it is quick, it is too impersonal. You want him to call because it gets him to interact with you and you should be able to sense how serious he is through his voice inflections and tonality.

If Joe declines the invitation, thank him for his time and move on. Don’t waste your time chasing after him.

After all, there are a lot of people out there that you haven’t met yet who you can probably help.

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